my mother. [life as it is]

by amandamaephotos

Today I woke up late, yet again, for work. When I say late, I mean 45 minutes. I am late every day, by at least 5 minutes. One of my New Years resolutions was to get to work on time. That has happened twice so far. I’m terrible. But, still have a job. I am grateful.
On top of being late, I had no voice and the worst bed hair. Not my first choice of starting a morning. I secretly hoped that my boss would take one listen to my voice and tell me to go home, get some rest and drink lots of tea with honey. But, the reality of life did not allow such luxuries. Instead I greeted the first guest with a croak, some coffee and a forced smile. I had that whole woe is me attitude going on. That has been a reacurring thing since the end of last month. Not the best way to start off a new year, is it. I’m hoping its just the winter blues as my mom put it today.
Or maybe it’s all the bad news heard on the news, of natural disasters and mass killings. If that’s not enough to get you down, I don’t know what is.
Or maybe it’s my restless spirit. My search for a purpose. I thought a lot this morning. I thought about leaving. Leaving everything I own and moving. Moving to a country where I would appreciate life more. Living with nothing more than a suitcase of belongings and my camera.

I don’t know.

So, I called my mom. She is the only person I can really pour my heart out to. I’m guessing it’s that whole mother daughter bond. She somehow helps to put things in perspective. She doesn’t always have the answers, but a keen sense on how to soothe the situation. It’s a gift. Here are some examples. She sends my siblings and I a quote every day. These are a few from the past two weeks.

“Put Christ first and you’ll find a joy that lasts.”

“Great triumphs are born out of great troubles.”

“You won’t stumble in the dark if you walk in the light of God’s Word.”

How did she know I needed to hear that? She just does, and I love her for that. I couldn’t ask for a better mom.

This is my beautiful mother. Always with a cup of tea. Must be why I like tea too.

Thank you mom for your constant encouragement and long telephone conversations. It would be hard to do it without you. I love you! 🙂

Don’t ask me why I just spilled all of this out on the blog. I guess I just want you all to know that, even though I always try and keep a positive exterior, I’m human and have a constant battle within. Sometimes have more bad days then good. This is me being real. With you. Hope you don’t mind.

Now on to find my purpose.

Yours truly, Amanda